Wednesday, March 26, 2014

(Un)Real talk

Holy shit. I forgot I had this. Well, it is not like anything interesting happened,  other than what appears to be the Rake showing up.  We only heard something,  but we weren't really taking our chances.

Let me talk about how I feel. To be honest I don't really know. I mean, having to move around so much gets bothersome,  I guess it is better than being stuck in a room for a long period of time. And at least I have some campanions with me. They help keep me company, so I won't get too lonely or kill again. So far, so seemingly good.
I still have nightmares sometimes. These aren't the nightmares where I'm being chased or it gets so dark and there's something whispering or I'm being yelled at or everyone hates me. Lately I have nightmares of hurting others, plus some of the other nightmares I have just listed.

And it feels so unreal. Like I look through my post and I keep wondering if that actually happened or if I remember it wrong. Like when I killed that man with my own two hands and threw him in the city. Did I really throw him in the ccity or did I just tthink that I did? Iwas so out of it. The city is supposed to suck you in when you open it. I think. Maybe it made an exception to me or maybe I remembered it wrong and was being hopeful.  Damn this.

There is also that man who keeps on following us. He does not show up too often.  Thank goodness.  I get anxious whenever I see him
I wish that he will just leave me alone. Seriously,  what does he want? I just want to forget.