Thoughts

I forgot to mention earlier that I got another note telling me the time and place. I have about half an hour before the time, so I'm just going to type out some thoughts. I've been thinking about the note and the crimes that I have committed.  It has been in the back of my mind for years. Not the note, the crimes.

I am still trying to figure all this out.

It really doesn't make any sense. Now that I know I have murdered people, I want to know why I killed them.

Did He make me do it? Does his powers go beyond memory tempering? I doubt it, but He sure didn't help.

Perhaps I am a puppet. Then, if that's true, why did I kill another puppet?

My actions are also somewhat in my control. I say somewhat because I can't remember most things.

The only explanation that I can think of that sort of makes sense is that the Rake caused all this. If I recall correctly, the Rake has a habit of implanting ideas while one sleeps. But, the thing is, I have barely seen him since childhood and a few other times. What set off that horrible urge? Or was he coming to me while I slept recently? Telling me what to do.

Why would the Rake get me to kill his game? As that man told me. The only reason I can think of is just to screw with us. Yes, I said us. The Rake probably has "servants" that he puts against each other. Why? It must be his form of amusement. Does that make me a servant? I guess.

I wonder if this means Gramps (I still refer to him by that silly nick name. Damn habits.) and the Rake were working together. Why? I don't really know. All I know that both were screwing with me. Maybe they just decided to work together for a while until they break me and then one can betray the other or some shit like that. Then again, I can be completely wrong.

Well, I'm leaving. Once I meet that man, I'll be ready.